Monday, October 11, 2010

It is in the little things...

So tonight was chock full of those little moments you want to freeze in time to take out and savor and relish in later and since that is not an option, it was all I could do to wait until tonight to get them preserved here for my future self to pull out someday to remember how blessed I was to call these amazing boys mine. I am so blasted enthralled with these two humans that I was chosen to be responsible for... who call me momma. And I melt nearly every time I hear it. Every second I can spend with them is perfection, even when it is not, it still is...ya know?

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We continue to milk every second of daylight out of each evening as summer fades more and more every day. Tonight we all trekked outside for a bit more tossing of broken toys, bent umbrellas, and such. I was having a camera issue (read broken) and you two went off to play. Out of nowhere I hear Mack talking in an incredible sweet voice to Radley and teaching him to do "hi-fives". He was so sweet, so kind, so encouraging...with celebratory "Good job Radley's!!" sprinkled throughout. And R got it! Then it was a cute game for them and they high-fived each other going down the slide and I must be doing something right as Maverick always says "OK Radley, your turn!" when he is done. It made me a bit misty to see Mack so sweet and Radley so starstruck by his big bro. It was wonderful.

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And every night snuggling and singing Radley to sleep so easily and feeling him let go and melt into me and start breathing deeply. No matter how frustrating the day, I love this one-on-one time with him every night. It washes my soul and makes everything ok. It is my reset button on a day.

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Then still later as I lay in bed spooned up to Maverick after our story time and out of nowhere he got the hiccups, which ultimately sent us both into fits of giggles snuggled up together in the dark.

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But as I lay there, curled up against his back, the moment awakened the long-ago feeling of his in-utero hiccups. Practically once every day the last couple months of my pregnancy. How I worried that something was wrong. How I frantically searched Dr Google for what could be wrong. As it turns out...hiccups are just hiccups...but how tonight reminded me of then, before these two little humans rocked my world in the best possible way...and it brought a smile to my face and a pang of how fast it goes.

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Just miniscule moments...snippets of time...small in scope and unimportant to most that, to me, fill my spirit and are what my life today is all about. What I was put here to do. What I always wished for with all my heart and soul. With as often as they are told, there is not much chance they will ever forget how much they are loved. And our little world, for today, is perfect.

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